House Rules for Adult Children

Having had my last child become an adult opened up a whole new side to me.  Since I no longer have to get up early for school, or make sure I am home when school is over, I feel a new sense of freedom.  In this, I have decided there needs to be a few new 'house rules' implemented.  I also feel that though I'll always be Mom, the other titles that have come with that territory no longer apply.

Feel free to use this if you should happen to have Adult children living in your home and seem to be taking advantage of your good nature!

As of today things will change. You are adults living with your parents. You have chosen to live the life of an adult and wish to be treated like one, therefore your wish has been granted. In addition to being treated like one, you will be expected to act like one. This is our home, yet you continue to tell me it is my home, so be it. Things you have taken for granted are mine as well and I will continue to let you use them, provided you treat them like they are borrowed.

1.) I am your Mother, not your maid. You will pick up after yourselves. If I find your items of clothing left on the floor AFTER you leave for work or elsewhere, it will be thrown in the garbage.

2.) Papers, mail, clothes and other items are not to be left on my table. Your 1 purse/bag may be allowed to set there. It is for eating at. If you do not choose to eat at it, so be it. If I find something left on it, that does not belong, it will be thrown in the garbage.

3.)  Ashtrays - Empty them.  Do not shove them under the couch or worse, leave them setting on the couch.  Your cups that you bring home from work, are either to be thrown in the garbage, or not brought in at all.  I am tired of picking up your mess.

4.)  TV - It is not a ‘catch all’, fingernail polish, and grooming items are to be removed and taken care of.  It is a place of decoration NOT part of the bathroom.  If you have children, you will clean up after them.  Diapers, bottles, clothes and such are to be taken care of as soon as they are used.

5.)  Towels.  These are mine.  You will be allowed to use them, but they will be taken care of.  No more throwing them around for me to pick up.  If this cannot be followed, I will remove all towels from your use.  You will then have to supply your own towels, and if I find them laying around, refer to rule #1.

6.)  Dishes.  These too are mine, if you dirty them, wash them.  The kitchen is mine as well, if you were to rent a room elsewhere, you might hear the term “Kitchen privileges”, this means if you choose to cook, you MUST clean up your mess.

7.)  The bathroom.  This too is mine as it is part of my house.  I do not use it, because I have allowed you to have your privacy.  Because it is in the hallway, it is considered a ’guest’ bathroom, which means others use it.  Keep it CLEAN, if you take a shower, clean up after yourself.  Take care of your garbage.  Remove your clothing from the floors.  If I have to do the cleaning, refer to rule #1.

8.)  Washing machine and dryer.  This too is mine.  I allow you to use it.  Laundry Room privileges are allowed, in turn you must take care of the items you wash and dry.  Do NOT put the items on top of the dryer until ‘someone else’ (me) takes care of them.  As it is my washing machine, if I leave something in the washer, put it in the dryer.  Keep in mind, this is mine and I can do that.  If there are clothes in the dryer, FOLD them.  This is a small price for the privilege of using them.

9.)  If I choose to make dinner, I will do so and you are automatically invited to eat.  If I choose not to cook, do not berate me.  Keep in mind - You are an adult now.  If you were living on your own, you would have to cook for yourself.  If you are the last one to eat, put the leftovers in the fridge.  We have become entirely too wasteful in this home.

10.)  My bathroom - It is mine and Dad’s.  We share it.  Anything in it is mine.  If you borrow something from it, PUT IT BACK!!  If you use it because yours is being used, TAKE CARE of YOUR stuff.  If you cannot remember to do so, refer to rules #1 or #2.

11.)  My Computer - Yes, it is mine.  I am attempting to do something for myself on this computer.  I don’t expect you to understand what I am doing, just that I am doing something.  If you don’t like it - tough.  Buy your own computer, with that you must also buy a wireless connector, or some such other way of connecting to the internet.

If I ask you to do something, I am not picking on you.  It is something that just needs to be done.  Do not argue with me, do not ask me why I have asked you to do it.  We all live here and the filth has just gotten out of control.  Dusting and vacuuming along with general wiping down of items is not a punishment, it is a necessity.  

At this time I have chosen to not charge you rent.  I my attempting to help you, in this I see that I have failed.  It has become clear to me that in my kindness I have done you a disservice.   Because you have not learned to take care of yourself, your property or the property of others.

 I may from time to time ask you for money to help pay the bills, I am not picking on you, it is out of necessity.  You have taken advantage of me in the assumption that I am here to be your maid, your cook and in general your doormat.  This does not mean that I do not Love you, nor do I feel that you do not Love me.  I am just tired of being taken advantage of.

If these simple rules cannot be followed, then I will be forced to charge you ‘housekeeping’ services.  Most house keeping service companies charge approximately $150.00 per person per week.  If you feel that you can get a better deal somewhere else, then by all means do so.  I will ALWAYS be your mother, and in that you will ALWAYS be loved.